1. Evaluating Your Associations (Part 2) by Jim Rohn
2. Vitamins for the Mind—Kids by Jim Rohn
3. Creative Goal-Setting for Kids and Teens by Denis Waitley
1. Evaluating Your Associations (Part 2) by Jim Rohn
A couple of weeks ago, we took a look at the power of influence in our lives and how it is possible to be nudged off course a little at a time until, finally, we find ourselves asking, “How did I get here?”
We then asked three key questions:
1) “Who am I around?”
You’ve got to evaluate everybody who is able to influence you in any way.
2) “What are these associations doing to me?”
That’s a major question to ask. What have they got me doing, listening to, reading, thinking and feeling? You’ve got to make a serious study of how others are influencing you, both negatively and positively.
3) “Is that okay?”
Maybe everyone you associate with has been a positive, energizing influence. Then again, maybe there are some bad apples in the bunch. All I’m suggesting here is that you take a close and objective look. Everything is worth a second look, especially the power of influence. Both will take you somewhere, but only one will take you in the direction you need to go.
This week, we want to discuss three ways to handle associations or relationships that are holding you back.
1) Disassociate.
This is not an easy decision, nor something you should take lightly, but in some cases it may be essential (please don’t e-mail me asking me to advise you about this—only you can decide). You may just have to make the hard choice not to let certain negative influences affect you anymore. It could be a choice that preserves the quality of your life.
2) Limited association.
Spend major time with major influences and minor time with minor influences. It is easy to do just the opposite, but don’t fall into that trap. Take a look at your priorities and your values. We have so little time at our disposal. Wouldn’t it make sense to invest it wisely?
3) Expanding your associations.
This is the one I suggest you focus on the most. Find other successful people who you can spend more time with. Invite them to lunch (pick up the tab) and ask them how they have achieved so much or what makes them successful. Now, this is not just about financial success; it can be someone who you want to learn from about having a better marriage, being a better parent, having better health or a stronger spiritual life.
It is called association on purpose—getting around the right people by expanding your circle of influence. And when you do that, you will naturally limit the relationships that are holding you back. Give it a try and see for yourself.
To Your Success,
Jim Rohn
2. Vitamins for the Mind by Jim Rohn
Kids
How many languages can a child learn? As many as you will take the time to teach them.
Even kids can get started on becoming financially independent. Kids can make profits long before they can legitimately earn wages.
Kids ought to have two bicycles: one to ride and one to rent.
Kids don’t lack capacity, only teachers.
I teach kids how to be rich by the time they are age 40, 35 if they are extra bright. Most kids think they are extra bright, so they go for 35.
What should a child do with a dollar? Here’s one philosophy: It’s only a child and it’s only a dollar, so what difference does it make? Wow, what a philosophy! Where do you suppose everything starts for the future? Here’s where it starts—it starts with a child and a dollar. You say, “Well, he’s only a child once. Let him spend it all.” Well, when would you hope that would stop? When he’s 50 and broke like you?
If kids clearly see the promise, they will gladly pay the price.
3. Creative Goal-Setting for Kids and Teens by Denis Waitley
An Indian guide who displayed uncanny skills in navigating the rugged regions of the Southwest was asked how he did it. “What is your secret of being an expert tracker and trail-blazer?” a visitor asked him.
The guide answered: “There is no secret. One must only possess the far vision and the near look. The first step is to determine where you want to go. Then you must be sure that each step you take is a step in that direction.”
A dream is what you would like for life to be. A goal is what you intend to make happen. A goal is the near look; what, specifically, you intend to do on a daily basis to get there.
No matter what their current ages, try to determine the sensory learning style of each of your children: visual, auditory or kinesthetic. Visual learners understand and remember best what they see. Auditory learners prefer to hear and verbalize in order to comprehend. Kinesthetic learners need to involve touch and movement into the processing of new concepts, and to learn by doing. All of these styles have some overlap because we all use hearing, seeing and doing. But keep these styles in mind when you stimulate your children’s creative and goal-setting activities.
To build a pattern of positive expectations for your children, they need a way to keep score. Children know they are doing well when the task or project is well defined and the goals are clearly stated. How can a child experience the thrill of hitting the bull’s eye when he or she doesn’t know what the target is? Kids need to see the end before they begin a task or they will lose interest. When you are giving your child a task, such as cleaning her room, be specific in telling her what you want her to do and when you want it done and stick to it. By providing a clear and specific ending, your child can look forward to enjoying time with her friends when the task is completed.
Goals are the target of success! Who you see is who you’ll be. What you set is what you get. Help your kids get the far vision, the dream. Help them get the near look, the steps and action plans that pave the road to their dreams. Participate in your children’s games, problem-solving exercises, field trips and creative projects. Instead of telling them how things work, help them learn to discover the “hows” and “whys.”
Help your children dream about their future. Set the example by jotting down and cutting pictures out to describe family dreams. Assist them in defining their own goals and writing them down on index cards. Post the cards in their bedroom or on a board where they can see and review their goals daily.
Help your kids prioritize their goals. Have them consider their goals in the order of their importance. Place beside each written goal a proposed target date for the attainment of that goal.
Help your child make plans. Unfortunately, many kids view problems as insurmountable mountains. Your role as parents is to help them view problems as opportunities. Teach them to go over, around, under or to bore a hole right through their roadblocks.
Show children how to prepare a daily “to do” list. In the evening, help prepare a list of a few important things to do the following day. At the end of the day, help them review their progress. By using index cards, you can use a file box to store daily activity cards. Monthly, quarterly and yearly, let them go through the cards in the box to see all they have accomplished through step-by-step actions.
Help your kids to visualize, in advance, what the accomplishment of their goals looks and feels like. Bedtime is an ideal setting, where you can see in their imaginations where they want to be, what they want to do, and things they will have to work and save for to get.
Build goals and evaluations around the school year. When you go over your child’s report card, discuss the goals that he set for himself and how he is doing toward achieving those goals. Share with your child any comments teachers might have regarding his grades.
Kids need rewards, and behavior that gets rewarded gets repeated, especially if they understand that the reward is coming when the goal is accomplished. Rewards do not have to be strictly financial, but can be going out for ice cream or whatever your child enjoys doing. By rewarding goal-directed behavior, you are providing additional incentive to achieve almost any goal.
—Denis Waitley
“God has the tough end of the deal. What if instead of planting the seed you had to make the tree? That would keep you up late at night, trying to figure that one out.” —Jim Rohn
“One of my good friends always says, ‘Things don’t just happen; things happen just.’” —Jim Rohn
“The soil says, ‘Don’t bring me your need, bring me your seed.’” —Jim Rohn
